Tuesday 19 June 2012

Won havz dursydid tu rurlees sum fotoz ov wonself for wonz Royl hurfishil burfday wot woz reesintly an won hexpex tu see em sun on stampz.  If not won wil be duin sum stampin ov wonz own!




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TThis iz the won for the stampz

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An fynurly, won wif wonz dyur huzbun the Pwins Wee-jint Mr Nutmeg Varmint Sir wot iz kurintly owt in the Royl Bertanikil Gardinz ov Kyoo (or az the lowly slaev sez, playin owt in the garding an trying tu fiend anyfing tu eet wot the burdyz dropziz owt ov themz feedurz)



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Long Live Betty!
 

Thursday 7 June 2012

Wonz Joobly Speetsh


Tu wonz dyur subjekz at hoem an in the wydur Kominwelf

Won an wonz famly havz byn havin a luvly tiem dyoorin wonz Joobly.  Wonz slayv yvin orgurnyzd A stryt pahty for won an wonz huzbun in owur livinrum.

Wot won injoyd mostist woz the horsyz.  Thay kaymd tu dans for won from orl owvur the wurld.  Ther woz Mownteez an Indyinz an Kowboyz an Plees horsyz an evryfin.  The Kosak horsyz woz urmayzin.  Thay woz gulalipin akros the ureenur an the peeplz woz duin akro-batix on themz bakz.  An hangin orf themz siedz tu. Won an wonz huzbun woz gaspin.  An that Frensh blowk wot brings in the horsyz wif no hatz on an thay stil did orl the fingz he asktid them tu du.  Yvin the litl fowlz.  An orl the singin childrinz from Afrika.  Thay woz styoopendis.

An peepilz havz bene sow kiend.  Won havz had lotz an lotz an lotz  ov gud wishiz from orl wonz subjekz wot havz mayd won smiel lotz tu.  Orl the peepilz woz singin tu won on the Mall an the sowljurz woz shutin themz noyzy gunz an evryfing.  An ther woz haeryplaenz flyin owvur tu.  Thay woz a bit noyzy. 

Won havz kermandid the slayv tu tiep this on the nyoo iPad fingy.  She sed it woz hard tu du at furst bykoz it keptid chaynjin wot she had ritin, but it havz prity mutsh givin up now an itz letin  hur tyep wot won is diktaytin tu hur wif fyoour an fyoour prowtestz.  It must be gaynin a hyooj vowkabyooliry.  Won iz very hytek, yoo noe. Won woz yvin nowzin arownd hur foen the uvur dae.  She woz panikin a bit for sum reezin, but she needint ov wuryd.  Won havz susd it owt an wil hav a go at playin wif it at the furst hopurtyoonity.  Won wundurz wy she havz turnd that funy purpl kulur?

Won hoepz wonz fyoochur yurz on the froen wil be az gud az the past yurz havz bene, an wif yor serpawt an the serpawt ov wonz dyur huzbun, won iz shoor thay wil be.  Fankyu tu orl wonz loyl subjex, evin the slaev.

By Royl Kermand

Her Royl Hoppiness

Kween Betty Winzer

An

The Pwins Wee-gent

Mr Nutmeg Varmint Sir

Sunday 22 April 2012

Gud mornin dyur subjekz.  Won iz just rekuvrin from the aftur efektz ov wonz burfday party.  Not the hufishul burfday wen won havz got tu giv a speetsh but wonz propur burfday.  Did yoo orl hyur the bum! bum! bum ov the kaninz fyrin from orl the kasilz?  It woz kwiet spektakulur but orfly noyzy.  Wonz pur yurz.

Won iz not gowin tu riet for long bekoz won iz tyurd, az won sed befaw.  An wonz huzbun wontz won tu switsh the lietz owt.  So won wil be breef.

Meny fankz tu orl ov yoo wot sendid won kardziz and wotnot.  It iz not yoozhyul tu send telygramz TU the Kween but won hopreeshyaytid the emaylz wot won got.  Wonz huzbun let won hav furst biet at the karit topz an  the kabij as a speshil treet.  Yoo kud see he woz fiendin it hard tu kontayn himzself, tho an he dievdid in prity kwikly.  He orlso givd won a shok!

Slaev had been upsterz.  She sed she woz wurkin.  Yeh, riet.  Enywae, she mustuv got tu hot koz she woz kliemin down the sterz wif hur jumpur in hur hand insted ov wairin it.  Won wishiz she wudint du that.  It iz kwiet diskonsurtin inuf tu hav tu sher a hows wif a hyoomin, but havin won wot kypz taykin hur fur orf iz just not tu be toluraytid. Enywae, at the botim ov the sterz, she fru hur jumpur ontu the bak ov the sowfur.  Wonz pur huzbun got the friet ov himz lief an he jumptid owt ov the forij trae at the speed ov liet an ran rownd the sofur tu wer won woz snoozin.  For a owld bun he karnt harf muv!  Won woz roodly awaykind an had tu leep up an run rownd tu the uvur sied ov the sowfur and ther was the slaev in hur undyz!  Kuvur wonz yz!Orf wif hur hed!  An on wif hur jumpur!  An yoo now wot, subjekz, fru the hopologyz to wonz huzbun she woz lafin!  Wota chyk! She sed it luktid funy, won buny bot dishopeerin rownd won sied ov the sowfur an a difrint buny hed hopeerin rownd the uvur.

Treezin!

Lief in the doghows!

Sunday 18 March 2012

Sundae afturnun domestisitee

Gud afturnun, subjekz, Kweeny hyur aftur a prowlongd absins.  Slaev havz fienly taykin a rest from wurk an let won at the pyootur.

She stoptid tu mayk won an wonz huzbun sum deelishus bunny bikyz, but du yoo no wot?  She woent let won an won lik the boel!  Us bunnurz korlz that rotin!

She havz mayd a mixtyur wot smels deelishus, evin tu hur unejyookaytid noez an it iz kurintly 'restin' in sum kling stuf in the frij befor she kukz it intu skrumy bikyz for won tu nom on.

She woz kreeaytiv tudae.  This is wot she yoozd

Dri stuf

Wonz pelitz
Sum pelitz wot iz tu hard for won an won rerfyooziz tu eet
Sum pelitz wot Anty Jeri sent from Sweedin
Sum porij oatsiz (not meny ov thoez)
Sum gras meel
Sum ov wonz hae snippd up intu littl bitziz...she woz mownin abowt that coz she neely sniptid hur fingurz an she sed hur hand woz aykin from gripin the hae tu snip it...ther is lotz ov this ingreedyint...yum!
Sum ov wonz dryd dandylienz
Sum ov wonz dryd cowltzfut (not mutsh ov this ingreedyint...shaem!)

Orl ov theez fingz got wizd rownd an rownd very lowdly in the blendur fingy then dumpt in the mixin boel.

Gooy stuf

Harf ov a scrumy narnur...wonz mouf iz wartrin now
Sum chopt up apil
Sum snipt up bitz ov spring greenz...she moend agen..how preediktibl  Saem az the hay.

Orl ov theez fingz got wizd rownd in the blendur fingy orlso an then mixtid in wif the dri stuf to klag it orl tugevur.

Wen she woz hapy wif wot she had dun (an won woz clymin up yur leg wontin tu help) she put it orl intu sum klingy filmy stuf and skwosht it tugevur then put it in the frij an she sez it havz got tu stae ther for a wiel then she wil roel it owt an kut it up an kuk it for won an won wif sum for wonz frenz the Jordy Gang tu.

Won karnt waet!  But wy woent she let us  - or rarvur WON - hav the mixin beol?  Wot a swiz!

She sez this iz orl in practis for a riet Royl feest for wonz Joobly wot iz hapnin laytur this yur, an orlso for the Bunnylympikz wot won wil be owpnin erfishly wif a SPEETSH!  Won iz bizy kompowzin.  Wotsh this spaes.

By Royl Kermand

Kween Betty Winzer

and orlso

Mr Nutmeg Varmint Sir
The Pwins Wee-jent

Sunday 25 December 2011

Wonz speetsh tu the Kominwelf an Byond at Krismis 2011

Dyrist subjeks, at hoem, in owur Kominwelf an in the wydur world, I sendz yoo Royl greetinz this Krismis, 2011.

Wot a bizy yur wonz huzbun an I havz had.  We wur pleezd wen the slaev startid duin sum propur wurk at last.  Wot we didint reeliez at the tiem woz that she wud vircherly diserpeer!  She woz a pur howskiepur orlredy but the Royl palis havz gon tu rek an roon now koz won kan bearly drag hur awa from hur kybord.  Tap, tap, tap, orl dae long.  Begin leturz, survayz, dokyoomintz, groopziz an 4umz.  We havz tu stamp lotz just tu remiend hur tu get owt for sum forijin!  We nowz it iz orl gud wurk for owur bunny subjekz, an it needz duin, but kan we hav hur bak for a fyoo minitz pur dae, pleez?  Sheez not mutsh yoos, but sheez the ownly slaev weev got!

We hav towld hur she havz got tu taek a bit ov tiem orf tudae bekoz owur vidyo needid huplowdin tu yootyoob.  We didint reeliez she hadint eevin put it tugevur so we put hur tu wurk this afturnune maykin it an uplowdin it.  Wud yoo burleev we had tu mayk hur mayk it twies?   She iz kwiet fik, so pleez hekskyooz the naemz ov the kamrerz hopyrin at the botim ov sum ov the pikshurz an moovy klipz.  She had maed a riet mes the furst tiem but yoo wil be pleezd tu no that it iz shortur now an lotz mor intrestin.  We hav instruktid hur tu put on a deesint sowndtrak.  Yu kan fiend it hyur  http://youtu.be/VM6rGbpA58s

We hav had a vairyd yur ov kors.  The start ov it woz kowld but lotz ov fun.  We did binkyin an tunilin an genrily maykin the Royl Palis rarvur kowld by insistin on kypin the bak dor owpin.  Not unyoozhuly the yur seemz tu be endin evry bit az kowld in hyur an we iz spendin lotz ov tiem in frunt ov the fyur towstin wonselfs.

Ther woz lotz ov heksietmint in the sumur wif too Royl wedinz.  Ther woz a very memribl foto in the meedyur ov me in my fasinaytur wot woz deelishus. Wonz huzbun sadly deekliend tu hav himz foto taykin wif hiz matshin won.  It woz deelishus tu wif panzyz an rowsiz an dandylienz orl buwnd up wif bitz ov gras.

Ther havz been sad tiemz owvur the yur an we woz purtikyoolurly sadind tu hyur ov the urfkwaykz in Nyoo Zeelind an the fludz in the Filipynz wair wonz Anty Brigit stil havz hur famly

Famly ov kors iz very dyur tu won.  Wer wud won be wifowt wonz huzbun?  Wer wud won be wifowt wonz Anty Dottie an hur lot wot lukz aftur won and wonz huzbun wen the slaev gowz galurvantin?  Wonz Anty Dottie iz kiend tu won an givz TREETZ an MOR PELITZ than the slaev duz. An won met an dyooly bit wonz Anty Jooly tu.

Wonz helf woz a bit dojy urlyur in the yur wen won had the slaev in a panik an had tu vizit a speshlist an spend a niet in hopsital, but wonz huzbun kaem owvur an keptid won kumpny, wich chyurd won up now end.  Wonz pur tufurz gaev won sum greef an sow now the slaev havz tu get won wilo wot iz very taesty.  She sez she iz riskin hur liburty wen she pikziz it but she kan stop moenin.  I yam the Kween.  Thay wud not daer put owur slaev in klink.  The Kween havz spowkin.  Orf wif ther hedz!

We hav been very chyurd wen orl the onlien Antyz and Unkilz woz konsurnd ynuf tu send us gud wishiz wen won woz undur the wevur. It just shoez how mutsh a strong an konsistint monark is hopreeshyaytid.

We woz not sow hopy wen a norty gasman wos rood tu the slaev and put wonz Royl saefty in jepurdy by standin wif the dor owpin.  We hinstruktid the slaev tu see him orf the premisis.  Wel reely we wontid tu hav himz hed chopt orf but that mietuv maed a bit ov a mes on wonz karpit.

We hav bene hintrestid in the gowinz on ov guvurmentz and wotnot.  Thay orl seme helbent on maykin a mes ov evryfin, but ov kors that is yoosyul for polytishunz.  We towldid Mr Kamrin tu sort owt them Yooro fingyz an woz pleezd he had taykin a strong stand but he seemz tu hav orlmoest korzd a hinturnashnul hinsidint.  O dyur!

We kloez wif very best wishiz for a spydy rekuvry for the huzbun ov the uvur Kween Betty wot iz in hopsital tudae wen he must shooly wont tu be owt wif himz famly.  He havz bean havin a metil fing put in himz artry.  It must be skafowldin or sumfin.  But he iz a tuf owld boy an we ar shoor he wil be fien an bak tu maykin orlmiety gafz in now tiem flat.  Fank gudnes wonz own huzbun havz rarvur les tu sae for himz-self or the Royl Monarky miet be in a bit ov trubil.

My huzbun an I wish orl owur subjekz orl the very bestist of seezinz greetinz an hoep that 2012 wil be a wundurful yur for us orl.

Hur Royl Hoppiness

Kween Betty Winzer

an hur konsort

the Pwins Wee-jint

Mr Nutmeg Varmint Sir

Monday 1 August 2011

My Royl Wedin Speetsh

I ritid this in April on the hukayzhun ov the Royl Wedin.  I shud reely publish a nyu won for the nyu royl kupl but it woz a mor pryvit afayr for frenz an famly ownly so I fink it iz betur if I kepe that won kwyit.  Bersydz, my huzbun had tu mutsh shampayn an it iz probly betur if evrybuny just forgetz it.


Enyway, hyur iz my April spteetsh


My huzbun an I wud liek tu fank yoo orl for orl yor supawt an kiend wishiz
durin this hopy dae.



Liek orl ov yoo, we havz trooly injoyd this speshul dae, the pomp, the
krowdz, the horsyz, (mor abowt them in a minit) the kostyoomz, the flowurz
(speshly the flowurz!) an moest ov orl the serimuny.



Didint yoo orl luv the dres? It woz luverly. Sow sheek, sow elygunt.



We woz a bit agast at sum ov the hatz. Wy wur thay werin saterlyt dishiz on
ther hedz? Nun ov them woz az gud az owur Royl hatz wot the slaev maykd for
us. Won lukd proply elygunt in yelo, didint yoo fink?



Them plaenz woz noyzy but it woz nies tu see the owl wonz bein put tu yoos
agen aftur orl theez yurz.



My huzbun wontz yoo orl tu no that he did NOT forl asleap in the midl ov it
orl. Wel, not for long, enywae. He ownly snawd a litl bit.



We had a skrumy biet tu eet befor them norty yungsturz nipd owt in ther
dadyz kar. Then we had a gud titur undur wonz hand wen thay wur praydin
arownd the palis growndz in it.



Now, bak tu them horsyz. Wot a norty lot thay ar. Thay doent yooz the
litur trae at orl! Thay just poo evrywer! Orl the karij weelz woz gowin
fru it an wen them pur pesintz woz uprowtshin the palis, I bet lotz ov em
steptid in it. It woz pongy tu. Not liek nies fraygrint bunny pooz wot iz
luvly. An then horsyz woz wontin tu binky, but the riedurz didint let them,
did thay? I sor won wot skiturd akros the roed tho. I bet that got him
intu trubl. The sowljur an the horsy. Thay iz nies them horsyz. I
pertiklerly liekd won ov them Winzer grayz wot woz pulin the hapy kupl in
ther karij. He woz very hansum. I just hoep my huzbun didint spot me
maykin Is at him. Tee hee! Thay karnt harf eet, tho. I undurstand thay kan
nosh orlmoest a hoel bael ov hay in a dae! Kor! Won fing I havz nowtisd
abowt them iz that thay ar orl upy-eer. Wy iz ther no lopz, thatz wot I wont
tu no. We ar tryin hard tu undurstand egzakly wot thay havz dun tu ther
taylz, but it iz puzlin.



Wel, dyur subjekz, it havz bean a long dae an my huzbun an I ar tyrd so we
ar gowin tu hav the nies forijin the slaev havz bean tu pik for us in the
churtshyard. The yungsturz iz havin sum sort ov neezup an I hoep thay will
orl injoy themselfz.


Kween Betty Winzer



Hyur iz the hatz wot the slaev maykd for us bunz tu wer on the dae.  She korlz em fasinayturz

My sensibl huzbun rerfyoozd tu wer himz, but won lukd rarvur fetshin in wons fasinaytur az yoo kan see hyur


The bestist bit woz that we got tu eet em up pdq aftur...well aksherly dyoorin...the survis wen the slayvz attenshun woz elswer.


Tuesday 31 May 2011

Tu my dyur subjekz

Hulo dyur subjekz.  I yam yor kween.
Du yoo C how gorjus an reegl I yam?


I hav bean towld that ther woz anuvur kweeny, wot woz orlso korld Betty an that she woz a jinjurnut tu.  But she woz a but funy an she puld owt sum ov hur fur of hur hed koz ov sum fashin or uvur.  How daft.  I wil not let eny ov my luvly fur get chopt of.  I yam luvly as I yam.  An bang up tu daet wif evry fashin.


I yam nyoo tu this blogin fing but I yam very intelyjint an I wil katsh on fast.  Then I wil keap yoo orl up tu daet wif my Royl dyootyz.